Month 2 Workout Routine

Greetings fellow Lazy Bums, it’s that time again: Time for yours truly to hook you up with yet another gloriously lazy workout routine. This month is all sorts of fun, with a lot of the same familiar exercises as last month, and a few new ones to spice things up a bit. Plus, a whole new twist on the “how to do it” instructions that will make things a lot more, well, something…

(If this is your first time at LazyBumFitness.com, I’d recommend you start with the awesomely-awesome Month 1 Workout Routine. This one will still be here waiting for you next month…)

Okay, so let’s get down to business:

What You Need:

  • A pair of dumbbells, or better yet, an entire set of varying weights.
  • A pull up bar (or sturdy substitute, such as a tree branch).
  • Plenty of attitude. Good, bad, whatever; so long as you have it.

The Exercises:

All exercises are performed with dumbbells rather than barbells, except the Cardio (obviously) and Chin Ups, Hanging Knee Raises, Sit Ups and Crunches, which are basic body weight movements.

  • Ace: Cardio*
  • Two: Bench Press
  • Three: Squats
  • Four: One-Hand Overhead Press – Right Hand
  • Five: One-Hand Overhead Press – Left Hand
  • Six: Chin Ups**
  • Seven: One-Hand Arm Curls – Right Hand
  • Eight: One-Hand Arm Curls – Left Hand
  • Nine: One-Hand Power Cleans – Right Hand
  • Ten: One-Hand Power Cleans – Left Hand
  • Jack: Hanging Knee Raises
  • Queen: Sit Ups
  • King: Crunches
  • Jokers: Not used this month, take them out of the deck if you’d like.

*Note: See below for an entire section on this month’s cardiovascular stuff.

**Note: If multiple chin ups are too difficult, you can perform just ONE rep per set, rather than the whole face value of the card.

***Note: I really need to stop making notes.

How It Works:

This is pretty similar to the standard rules (read them here), but with a few fun little twists. Let me explain:

Cardio

For starters, I’ve included a card dedicated exclusively to “Cardio.” If you draw this one in your initial “choose four exercises” before you get started, you can forget about the weights and hit the pavement (or treadmill or elliptical machine or whatever). It doesn’t matter if you draw this card first or fourth, if you pick an Ace at this stage, it trumps the other cards.

The good news is that you’ll max out on Cardio after eight sessions. So it’s reign of terror over the dumbbells is limited. Once you’ve done it eight times, you’re done. Don’t be sad, it was fun while it lasted. Just treat the Ace like you would any other card that you’ve hit the goal reps for and move on.

As for what kind of cardio to do? That’s up to you. Just try to keep at least one element consistent. If you want to go outside and run for two miles, do that every time. If you want to climb on the treadmill for 20 minutes, do that every time. If you want to walk around your block a couple of times, do that each time. Heck, if you want to wrap yourself in bacon, slap your neighbors’ pit bulls and then frantically try to escape their snarling grasp, do that every time. The point is to keep some element (distance,  time) consistent so that you’ll gradually work a bit harder each time without really realizing it.

How Many Exercises Do You Do Per Day

Last month we drew 20 cards every day (once we established the four exercises). This month I’m going to change things up and have you start with 25 cards, and work your way down each time you work out. So the first day you hit the gym (not a cardio day) you’ll start by performing 25 total cards, meaning 25  total sets. Next time you’ll only use 24, and so on…

Again, if you draw an ACE (which is attributed to Cardio this month), you’ll skip all this junk and do some heavy breathing. Unless you’ve already done eight days worth. In that case just skip the ACE and draw another “exercise” card.

Total Rep Goals

Like last month, we’re aiming for a total of 200 total reps of each exercise. Once you hit 200 (or go over by a tad), you’re done with that movement for the rest of the month! Not too shabby, eh?

But you do have an option when it comes to the Chin Ups. Should you opt to perform only one rep per card, then there is no “limit.” So you’ll never cross them off your list this month if you go that route. Of course if you perform them for reps like you would any other exercise, then you CAN use the 200 rep limit.

How Much Weight To Use

Ready for some more Lazy Bum love? Like last month, we are going to increase the amount of weight you use each day you perform any exercise, but we’re going to ease into the “adding metal” mentality a little more gently this time around.

Start with your “starting weight” on the first day you perform an exercise, and use that weight for every set that you draw. Then increase the weight in small increments the next two consecutive days you perform it. After you’ve added weight twice, drop back to that middle weight and start over.

Confused? I am too. Not in my head, but trying to explain it is tough. So let’s use an example. Let’s say you’re working some arm curls with your right hand, and the first day you draw/perform this movement you start with a 10 pound dumbbell. Here’s how your record would look:

  • The first time: 10 pound dumbbell
  • The second time: 15 pound dumbbell (up one “increment”)
  • The third time: 20 pound dumbbell (up another one)
  • the fourth time: 15 pound dumbbell (down one)
  • the fifth time: 20 pound dumbbell (up one)
  • the sixth time: 25 pound dumbbell (up one)
  • the seventh time: 20 pound dumbbell (down one)
  • and so on…

Of course you could use whatever “increments” you want so long as you stay consistent. For example, my gym has 12.5 pound dumbbells, so maybe I’d work in 2.5 pound increases/decreases rather than five pound ones. Again, it’s up to you.

Don’t be dumb, though. If you get to a point where you’re slinging weights that are clearly too heavy for your ability level, tone it down. Don’t get yourself hurt. Remember, if you’re straining to complete that last rep, that’s a good thing (so long as you don’t get sloppy), but if the weights are crashing down on your exhausted body, that’s a BAD thing.

How Much Weight To Start Off With

The way this workout routine is set up, you’ll want to start out with something that’s very easy, maybe a bit too easy. Because as we add weight things will get pretty out of hand if you’re struggling from day one.

Generally speaking, I start with a weight that I could easily do an entire set of 25 repetitions. Or for the lifts that carry over from last month, I’ll start out this month just a tad bit higher than I started last month, not a lot, but just enough to take advantage of the HULK strength we get from Lazy Bum Fitness.

Don’t Repeat Any Exercise Back-To-Back

Pretty self explanatory. Whatever you did last time you worked out with this routine is off limits the next time, even for cardio. If you draw a card that represents an exercise that you did yesterday (or the last time you worked out) draw again. Think of this kind of like a built-in active rest system. Or, in reality, a way to stay really, really lazy and still get amazing results.

Log Your Results

With all the craziness in this routine, tracking your progress on paper is super important. If for no other reason that you’ll love that feeling of accomplishment when your reach that 200 rep milestone and cross an entire exercise off the list of possibilities. Besides, in today’s modern age, remembering how to use a pen and paper is becoming a lost art; thus making you an artist.

And Lastly

It pains me to say this, but in our lawsuit happy world we live in It’d be suicide not to mention this: Perform this routine at your own risk, and check with a doctor before getting started.

That’s it. Now get out there and get to it. Lose some weight, build some muscle and start getting mistaken for Hollywood celebrities.